Week 14, Famous Last Words: Failure, Fun, Firewater

Alas! Just when my stress levels are at an all-time high, more stress comes alone. I have this lovely and delightful class called, Embedded Real Time Systems. If you don’t know what that it is, it’s okay…neither do I. In this class we have a weekly project where we have to program something on our hovercraft. Now, the group I am in has one…complicated member. He is a good guy but has his quirks. This week he didn’t meet with us, and he was in charge of the code that was due yesterday which is still not turned in. Yay.

Thankfully, the professor is super awesome and is working with us and I believe if we get it in as soon as possible I don’t think we will get a huge penalty. I wouldn’t care that much, but I have a C in that class and I hope to God I don’t fail another class. I sort of pay for my own schooling and who has two thumbs and can’t afford thousand dollars of debit? This girl (points at self).

Honestly though. All this…failure is really getting to me. I mean it has before, it comes with an engineering degree unless you are super smart. But think about it. I spend most of my time doing homework and studying. I keep telling my friends I can’t hang out with them until they eventually stop asking. Then I not only get the lowest test scores, don’t understand my homework so it feels like I fail in my classes and in my personal life. Not to mention I never sleep enough. So that triangle where you have to pick only two options is crap.

College Life

Now that my reader and I are depressed, let’s lighten the mood. So this weekend I discovered something AMAZING. My boyfriend, Matt, has had a Nintendo 64 this whole time!!! Apparently a cord was broken so he didn’t play it but the day after I talked to him about it, he brought home a new cord, Mario Kart, and a 6 pack of beer. Best night I have had in a while. 

Famous Last Words, Week 13: Failure is Success so they say

It looks like I am starting to use the Famous Last Words assignment as a venting system. I have another project in flight mechanics coming up on Monday and I am scared shitless. The last project took about 25 hours to get half way though and I made a 44 on it. We also have a test the following week. I am hiding in my house this weekend to try and get as much work done as possible from next week but I feel like it won’t matter.

I am so torn with this class. I don’t want to blow off another class in order to get the project done or study endless hours for the class if I am going to fail. But I also don’t want to miss the opportunity to not waste about ten thousand stupid dollars to be in school another year because I gave. I also think me being in school another year would actually really help Matt and I’s life and relationship. I don’t know. This is stressing me out so much and it is hard to just give it to God and not feel stressed out but it is coming at me like a brick wall.

What Next

In other news every single one of my classes is a letter grade lower than it should be. Which is going to kill my GPA if it ends up like it. OH! And if I fail I could possibly lose scholarships. Most scholarships I have are based on a GPA requirement and if I get blow that…bye bye money. Guess who pays for their own school. This over worked and apparently stupid girl.

Darn, I was going to use this assignment to complain about my hovercraft class. I guess that will have to wait till next time. 

Week 12, Famous Last Words

Looking at this extra credit option I saw that we could talk about an outside class and life outside of school (whatever that is). Well, I have just the class to talk about. I am currently failing a class called Flight Mechanics. Which should be noted that if I fail this class I will be here another year…woot. This could be good or bad. If I do pass I stick with my original plan and take a couple of summer classes and then trudge on to my senior year with a shaky knowledge in a very fundamental class. If I fail, I wouldn’t have to take summer classes so that’s a plus. I would also be able to pick up a minor in business which would be good for both my personal and professional life. Another good thing would be that Matt needs to get supervised after he graduates in order to continue his profession in Social Work. If I am here another year then he could use that time to get supervised and then maybe get his supervision transferred.

GBAA

As you can see I have put in a lot more thought into what happens if I fail. That is because I am not very optimistic about passing. I have been in this position before but I knew exactly where I stood and what I needed to get on the future exams and the final. At the moment I am completely in the dark of where I stand. I only know that I am below the average and that I made the lowest test score last time. In my other class I also knew what exactly I needed to do to improve my scores. This time around I can study for countless hours and it won’t matter a bit.

I am sure whatever happens is what is meant to be. Still sucks